I’m going to begin by telling you about some epiphanies I’ve had. I offer them not so much to tell you about myself but as an invitation for you to connect to the epiphanies in your life. They may be a little different from what you are used to when you think of an epiphany.

There’s the epiphany of my marriage. When Cyndy and I married I could never have foreseen where our life and love would go, how we would change as individuals and a couple, our joys and sorrows, our struggles and our accomplishments, or what our life together would be like today. I could only follow the star. 

There’s the epiphany of my parenting. I had no idea what I was in for, how to be a dad, or whether my two sons would even like me. I didn’t know where those two boys would take me, how they would change me, what impact I would have on them, the depth of my joy and gratitude or the depth of my regrets and wishes for a do-over. I could only follow the star. 

There’s the epiphany of my grief; the deaths of my older son Brandon, my best friend John, and the twenty-two who died in Uvalde on May 24, 2022. I didn’t know how or if I would even get through those losses, what to do and say, what life would be like or if there even would be life without them. I could only follow the star. 

There’s the epiphany of my priesthood. I could never have predicted that I would be in my twentieth year here with you, the shape of my ministry, the variety of experiences I’ve had, the things offered and asked of me, the struggles and joys, the faith and the doubts, the blessings and the disappointments, or the ways my life has been formed. I could only follow the star. 

I’ve come to realize that epiphanies aren’t so much an “Aha, I got it” kind of moment – a flash of insight, a sudden realization – but an “Aha, it’s got me” kind of moment. 

Something rises from deep within us, awakens our heart, and touches a desire or longing, known or unknown, in such a way that all we can do is follow the star even when we don’t know where it is taking us, what will happen along the way, or how our lives might be changed.  

I think that’s what happened to “the wise from the East” in today’s gospel (Matthew 2:1-12). 

They “observed his star and its rising” and all they could do was follow it. They didn’t know where they were going the day they left home. They didn’t know where they would be the next day, the next week, or six months later. They couldn’t predict what would and would not happen along the way, or how their lives might be changed. They couldn’t see their destination any more than I can see the destination of my marriage, parenting, grief, or priesthood.

Something had claimed and called them. Something got ahold of them and wouldn’t let them go.

I wonder when you’ve experienced that. What are your epiphanies? What has gotten ahold of you today and just won’t let go?

Don’t worry about where it’s taking you. Trust the star. Easier said than done, I know. I don’t know how many times along the way I’ve heard myself or another say things like: “But I don’t know where I’m going.” “I don’t know what to do.” “I don’t know what will happen.” “I’ve never done this before.” “I’m scared.” 

Follow the star. The star knows the way. That’s really all I have for you tonight. It’s all I’ve got for myself. It’s all the wisemen had. And it’s enough. It reminds me of a line from one of Emily Dickinsons’s letters.

“The sailor cannot see the North, but knows the needle can.”

The wise men cannot see the child or Bethlehem, but they trust the star can. Maybe epiphanies are not so much an event or point in time but an ongoing journey. Maybe we can never see the destination and maybe we don’t need to. Maybe we just need to follow the star.

So here’s my question for you. What stars are you following these days? What is the compass of your life?

• Are there particular values and qualities that direct and guide your life, standards and principles to which you hold yourself accountable?
• Who are the wise women and men whose advice and counsel you seek and trust? 
• Maybe there are certain scriptures and prayers that keep you centered and on track.
• What if love, compassion, justice, mercy, hope are stars in each of our lives?
• Who are the people that orient your life and what relationships give you stability?
• What nurtures and strengthens your life and lets you be more fully you?
• What challenges, enlarges, and grows your life?
• What practices help you return to and care for yourself?
• What dreams, hopes, and passions energize and move your life forward?
• What expands and deepens your relationships with others?

These and a thousand other things like them are the starlight of Epiphany. There’s never just one star but a whole constellation giving our lives shape and direction. 

Here’s what strikes me about today’s gospel. The wise men didn’t know the destination, but they knew they way. They knew which star to follow. And all they could do was follow the star. It’s the one that led and allowed them to open the treasure chest of their lives. 

That’s the star I want to follow. What about you?

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Image Credit: By Henry Ossawa Tanner – https://www.geocities.ws/pvtillman/tanner/christmas/wise.jpg, Public Domain, Wikimedia Commons.