“Many rich people put in large sums. A poor widow came and put in two small copper coins, which are worth a penny.” That’s what Jesus sees in today’s gospel (Mark 12:38-44). 

Jesus says those two small coins are more than all the rich people’s large sums combined. That’s just not mathematically correct. You know that, so do I, and I suspect Jesus knows that too.

Jesus is not counting the cash or doing the math. He’s not talking about a quantity of giving but a quality of living. So what is the more that the widow put in? Herself. She is the more. You are the more. I am the more. 

The widow is all in. She holds back nothing, keeps nothing in reserve. What would it be like to live like that? What would it take to live an all in life? 

A few years ago I asked my wife Cyndy, “What do you want for your birthday?” “You don’t need to get me anything,” she said. “There’s really nothing I want or need.”

“But I really want to get you something,” I said but I was thinking to myself, Yeah, I’m not falling for that one again.

“Okay,” she said. “What I really want is you. I want more of you. I want more time with you.” And I thought to myself, I just wanted your Amazon wish list. What does more of me mean? Is it a weekend trip, a day in San Antonio, an afternoon movie? Have you seen my calendar? Do you know how tired I am? I’m running on empty. I don’t know what I have or what’s left of me.

We all come to moments when we are faced with our own poverty. And that’s not about money.

Cyndy was asking me to be all in, to look at what I was holding back, and to keep nothing in reserve. 

What about you? In what ways are you living less than an all in life? How is that showing up in your relationships, the needs of others, the pain of the world, meaning and purpose in your life? 

More often than not, when I’m living less than an all in life I’m focused on what I do not have. “I do not have enough _____.” (Fill in the blank with whatever it might be for you.) For most of us it’s a short trip from “I do not have enough” to “I am not enough.”  

This widow has only two small copper coins. It’s all she has. What she does not have is more than what she does have. She has no wealth, power, control, status, reputation, or husband. And yet, she is all in. How did you she do that? What does she know?

I think she knows the power of detachment, the power of letting go. We usually think of detachment in relationship to what we have. For example, Jesus says, “Sell your possessions and give the money to the poor.” (Matthew 19:21) 

But what if there is also a detachment from what we do not have and what we are not? What if we could detach from the voices, conclusions, and judgments that come from what we do not have and what we are not? We just might be all in or at least a little more in.

I think that’s what this poor widow did. She detached and let go of what she did not have. She detached even from being identified as “a poor widow.” And she was all in. She didn’t just give to the treasury, she became the treasury. 

Maybe when we detach from what we do not have and what we are not, maybe only then can we begin to live an all in life. 

But that’s not easy. Being all in is a daily practice. Some days, some people, some circumstances are easier than others to be all in.

Maybe it’s kind of like doing the Hokey Pokey. We put our right foot in and then we take it out. But what if could if we could put our right foot in and leave a bit longer than usual before taking it out? What if we could put our left foot in without taking our right foot out? Maybe with practice we can learn to put our whole self in and leave it in. And isn’t that really the life you want to live?

For whom or what are you all in? What are you holding back and keeping in reserve? What keeps you from being all in? What might you need to let go of to begin living a more all in life? 

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Image Credit: The Widow’s Mite by Nick Thompson on Flickr, CC BY-NC-SA 2.0.